The Haunted’s Kiss of Regret and Repentance

The car we rode in was now outside the mansion, and I felt my nerve going haywire. We waited for someone to open the gate, and I saw the look of shock on everyone’s faces as I began to get out of the car with multiple bags as if I was staying for more than two days.

I realized that for almost four years, after I changed schools, that I hardly stayed long in our house. Even during the holiday, I celebrated them in our ancestral dwellings all around the country where my grandparents and other relatives lived. It was a rare sight to pack a bag, knowing I would be staying here longer than two days.

The people inside the house greeted me respectfully, and as I looked up at the mansion, it felt like I was entering a cage that I wasn’t getting out of. Izzy ran towards me as I was walking up the steps of the house, and I gave her a genuine smile. We never hugged nor shook hands; it was common for us to not be touchy aside from giving each other high fives or random touches or backrubs when one is upset.

“So, mom has no idea that the reason you’re back home is because of Rian’s hauntings? When do you plan on telling her and getting this thing settled?”

Izzy was with me while Perry went back to school when I entered the car that took me back home. It was a waste of bus fare, but she insisted that she wanted me to travel long distances with someone I was comfortable with. She had a ton of work to do, and her being with me would delay her in her school work.

I looked around my room and saw that it was well kept and there was no dust in it. I was glad that I could rest after a long bus ride. I looked back at Izzy as she patiently waited for me to answer her.

“I want to tell mom about what’s happening, but I feel like she would just be as cold and distant to me as ever. I still have negative feelings towards her from time to time, Izzy.”Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.

“Okay fine, I’ll respect your decision, but you need to come with mom and me to this new church that we found. There is a pastor who is both fashionable and spits the truth, and I think you would find her very interesting.”

“Church? Since when did you become so keen on going to church, Izabella? You are definitely someone who doesn’t see the church as something interesting unless the church sells your favorite branded clothes and things.”

“I know, but when I went there, there was something that made me feel like I should stay. Plus, the pastor is a woman who actually knows what she’s doing while standing on the pulpit. Knowing you, I’m sure you would find her interesting, especially her explanations and clothes. The woman definitely has style.”

“Okay, fine, but if that church is anything but effective, I will get up and leave. I need to find the right solution to this curse because I have no plan on being miserable my entire life.”

“I think misery has always been part of your life. You need to find a solution for your problems as the heir and not just a frustrated ex-girlfriend. Sometimes I’m glad that I’m the youngest, sis. The level of problem you’re always carrying makes me glad that God postponed my birth from first to last.”

I laughed at her sentiment, and I realized how right Izzy was about the life I had. After a few minutes of talking, Izzy left the house to have a study date with her friends since it was technically a weekday. I left school, but I was in college, and I was sure that my friends and teachers would allow me to be absent for a few days.

I checked my drawers and found the old diary that I never knew was still there. It was located at the bottom of all my stuff. While cleaning, I saw the words “Mine” outside of it. I never noticed that my diary had that word on the cover, and memory hit me.

In the past…

“Honey, if there is even a slight chance that you get pregnant and you won’t lose the baby, what do you think would be our first kid? I want it to be a boy and name it something like Ryu Kenn. That would be awesome, hon.”

“That is a bad name, Rian. I know those names are from that game you’re addicted to. It sounds like a name for an artificial human being that didn’t pass the trial run. Can’t you think of any other name that your kid would probably accept in the future?”

“Oooh, so you agree that we should keep the baby if you accidentally get pregnant by me? That is awesome! Let’s get you pregnant right here and right now!”

He earned a slap on his arm from me as I tried pushing him away. I can’t believe the idiot tricked me into answering that stupid question. Of course, I want children, but I am NOT going to make him the father.

“Are you crazy, Rian? I don’t want to get pregnant now. I have so many dreams I want to fulfill, and a baby will only get in the way of everything. I can’t risk my future just because of a pregnancy that I don’t plan on having until later when I reach twenty-six or twenty-seven.”

“Okay, but what if you DO become pregnant with a boy or a girl? What would you name it? I’m sure girls like you already have a name that’s prepared for the future. So what name did you dream of giving our kid?”

I thought for a moment, and I knew that I didn’t want to have a kid with him, so I wanted to give him a different name. However, I saw his sincerity in asking, and my guilt was enough to just give him the actual name I wanted.

“I wanted to name my daughter Lovelle. It means loved by all, and I didn’t want to name my son because I wanted his father to name him. So whoever I marry in the future, I want him to name my son if we have a son.”

Rian’s face changed, and I felt his grip on my hip tighten while we were cuddling on his bed under the sheets. I could feel his anger, but I decided to ignore it since I knew I would just be lying if I agreed that we would have children.

“Are you thinking of someone else to marry, Shyne?”

His voice was barely a whisper, and yet I heard the threatening tone loud and clear. I knew that his possessiveness was once again showing, and it added to the fear of what he could do the moment I decided to leave him for good.

“Rian, you and I could never predict the future. We can never be sure enough to know whether we will end up as husband and wife or not because time will always change people and relationships.”

“Time is just time, Shyne. A person decides if they want to change, and I have already decided that I won’t change. You are mine as I am yours, and even if you try, that will never change. I can do anything and everything to have you, my love.”

“Rian, let’s stop this discussion. All of the what-ifs that we have still do not depend on our own decisions because there are a lot of factors affecting it. Now, all I want is to forget this topic and take it slow. The future is still far away, and I am sure that there are still things that are bound to happen.”

Rian suddenly flipped me into a sitting position, and he held my neck in a soft hold. However, his eyes showed possession as he began to tighten his grip on my neck and my thigh to keep me in place.

“Just remember this, my love. Even if you change, my love will never change. I will love and possess you in every way possible, and not even fate can stop me. All these what-ifs and why not will not only be words. I’ll make it into reality and make sure you’re mine alone.”

I felt like he was going to entirely choke me as he started to move forward and kissed me roughly on the mouth, his hand on my neck and his other hand holding my waist tight was possessive. I closed my eyes, and my body burned with his tight hold and movement.

“Rian. You’re-you’re hurting me. Please let go of me. It hurts too much I-”

“You. Are. Mine. Shyne.”

Rian whispered in my ear as worry and fear of the future began to take over me. However, no matter how I think about it, all I could do was close my eyes in regret. I was digging a hole, and I couldn’t get out of it now.