Chapter 36
COLT
I WAS beyond shock.
Like the puzzle with missing pieces, I could see the whole picture now as everything clicked back together-that was their message that they would kill as many as they wanted to get to Iris. They didn’t care how many lives they took, and I felt sick at that thought.
I gritted out curses, but it didn’t help out lessen the anger deep inside me. My rage surged me for revenge.
Since I learned about what they did to Iris, all I wanted was to hunt them down, but it was damn frustrating that I didn’t have the power to do that.
Before Iris, all I wanted was to survive. I’d be a hypocrite if I said I wanted to protect the group with my life before my brother died. Yeah, I liked that, but because we protected each other. When Colton died, and Iris crashed into my life, everything changed.
For the first time, I found my purpose; I wanted to give her a safe shelter. I wanted to see her smile every day and protect her from the people who would do her any harm.
And I wanted her in my life. And to do that, I had to eliminate everyone who was after her.
“This is all because of me. I need to surrender.”
“What?” We exclaimed in a chorus and turned to Iris.
The car stopped to a halt.
Lois’ eyes widened with pure shock, freeing herself from Iris. Darick and Gael glanced at her as if she’d gone insane.
With eyes bulged out in anger, Frost turned to face Iris. “I will knock you unconscious, tie your limbs tight, gag you, and place you somewhere where no one can find you if you will ever say that again. Do you fucking hear me?”
Iris looked taken aback, certainly not expecting she would see that kind of reaction from Frost. “Did you not get it? They hurt people. They killed members of our group. They burned down the camp. I didn’t know if the Hamid family survived or not. I’m glad you’re all safe, but Colton and Gael almost died because of me. They threw us into the river, for God’s sake! And you still want to protect me? It’s one life versus many!”
I didn’t know what to do for the first time in my life. So many scenarios were swimming in my head, but none of them was a help.
Hopelessly, I leaned my arm against the window and rubbed my temples. I felt weak.
My heart ached, including my body and bones, and I felt like wax under the fire, slowly melting down helplessly.
I failed.
Again, I failed them.
With all my strength left, I pushed the door open and practically crawled down. My hands and legs were trembling with fear-of fear of something out of my control-of losing Iris-of losing the only family I had left.
Iris and Frost followed.
I just watched Iris and Frost engaged in an intense argument, and I couldn’t fucking talk like I lost my tongue and voice.
“And then what? You wanna be a hero, huh, twig? Well, let me spell it out for you, Iris. Heroes die. Look at the fucking world around you. No one remembers heroes anymore. No one fucking cares!” Frost threw his hands in the air.
“Templeton, try to-”
“You don’t get a goddamn statue at the museum, or you won’t even be remembered, and no one appreciates shits anymore. This is not a fucking fantasy that you’ll get a chance to live again. Just open up your goddamn mind for a fucking second, for God’s sake! This is our lives now that we have to face!”NôvelDrama.Org: text © owner.
“I don’t want to be a hero. At least let me save you, guys. I just want to do the right thing here. They will leave you alone once they got me, and they wanted me alive, so we might-”
“Jesus! Listen to yourself for once. Do you really think that’s the right thing to do? Saving our asses? How about you? And what makes you think they will hold at the end of the bargain once they have you? They’re fucking murderers, and murderers don’t care, don’t have heart and conscience! They’re liars and manipulative and a bunch of psychopaths!” Frost’s eyes protruded as he launched into Iris, gripped her little arms, and shook her to make his point.
“If that’s the only thing to do to save you all.”
I gulped, feeling the bile rising in my throat as I met her pleading gaze. She looked broken and lost, just like we all were. I had to lean on the hood to keep myself from standing still.
“For fuck’s sake, Snow, say something! Grow some balls, man, and tell her that her suicide plan is insane!” Frost glared at me, but I was still shaken to say a word.
My arms were vibrating with anger as I stood in heavy silence. My ragged breathing was the only sound I could hear as I pushed their voices out of my head. I needed to think, but even though I thought of that, I knew it was much easier said than done.
Brother, promise me you’ll stay alive and find your purpose.
“What can I say? She doesn’t care about us like we thought she did.” I caught my lip between my teeth, making it harder to stop trembling. Tears stung my eyes. I wanted to scream, but it seemed that I had lost my fucking guts, and I couldn’t grasp any strength if ever I had left to voice my emotions into words.
“That’s not true. Do you think I want to go back there? I am doing this for all of you,” Iris pointed out.
“If she cares, as she told me, then she should think about how we feel if she turns herself in. How would we feel if they hurt her and if we would ever get a chance to see her again.” I shrugged. “I think what she said to me was bullshit, and I shouldn’t have believed in her in the first place.” I got back inside the car and slammed the door with an overwhelming sense of dread.
Jesus Christ. It fucking hurts like hell.
I could still see her standing there, wearing pure shock on her face. She was still crying-her tears kept falling like streams. I couldn’t take my eyes off her as I was afraid I would not see her again if I blinked.
I was scared that despite our protest, I couldn’t change her stubborn mind and still chose what she believed was right.
And I’d never been so fucking scared in my entire life until today.